At almost 24, I barely remember the days of not having a computer at home – so while I do have some fuzzy memories of that sad, sad time, I more or less consider myself a digital native.

Wait – who am I anyway? I’m a student, an intern, a runner and a dedicated dog mom with about a buffet’s worth of stuff on my plate at any given time. A joint master’s (public health and health journalism/communications) student at the University of Minnesota, I dabble in a little of this and a little of that, mostly in the health and do-gooder arenas. I just moved over to 3Gen from Experience’s health care blog, Health Nuts, which describes me fairly well if I do say so myself.

And, as I said, a digital native, which I increasingly embrace. Especially when it comes to working with those who are not.

This summer, I’m working full time as an intern at a large state government agency where 42 percent of employees are over the age of 50. Nearly 70 percent are over 40. Needless to say, communicating electronically is not natural to many of them, and trust me, they’re still learning.

I’ve worked, volunteered and interned at quite a few organizations, and they all have different cultures in general, which extends to email etiquette. But, forgive me, this place is just weird. And it seems to me that many of its oddities have to do with these digital aliens.

We have some written rules, some unwritten, many spoken, a few you just have to figure out. But the rules are a little strange to a blogging, Twittering, Facebooking student who will panic if she doesn’t check her email at least hourly (and that’s pushing it).

Rule 1: Thou Shalt Not Let An Email Go Unrequited.
Really, I was told this. I’m hyper-sensitive to email overload, so I’m not used to sending a “Thank you,” “Will do” or “Rock on” response to every single email I get. I think it’s fair, in this technological age, to assume that one received an email unless you hear otherwise. That being said, I must reply to all emails here, which you can imagine gets a little awkward when both parties have been told to always reply. Typical email exchange:

Me: Thanks for the information, Bob. I will look it over.
Bob: Great. Thank you for reading it.
Me: Yes, I will read it. Thank you again for sending it.
Bob: Sure. I’m happy to provide it.
Me: Thank you.
Bob: No, thank you.
Me: Have a great weekend.
Bob: You too.
Me: What’s your favorite kind of pizza?

You get the idea. But if you don’t reply, even to an FYI-type message, many people default to thinking it must have disappeared somewhere in that darn cyberspace and just have to send another or call to follow up.

Rule 2: Thou Must Make A Follow-up Call (But I Will Have To Call You Back).
Speaking of following up, I think it’s necessary in many cases – especially when someone breaks the reply-to-everything-rule. I’ve been told phone calls are best in any situation. And also that they’re only good for follow-up. So I started with the phone, but most people who answered seemed frazzled to be interrupted. So I switched to email, with a consequent phone call if no response:

[ring, ring]
Me: Hi, Bob, just wanted to follow up on that email I sent on Friday.
Bob: Oh, you sent me an email?
Me: Yes, I sent it on Friday morning. It was about X, Y and Z.
Bob: Hmm. [clicking]
Me: Well, it said—
Bob: Oh, I see it. You sent me an email! On Friday! It’s right here!
Me: Yes.
Bob: Hold on, let me read it. [reading out loud] Oh, yes I did read this on Friday.
Me: Great, I just wanted to—
Bob: I did read this! I have no idea why I didn’t send you an email back.
Me: It’s no problem. Maybe we could talk—
Bob: Can I call you back? I need to read this again.
Me: [head to palm]

Rule 3: Thou Must Use All Tools At Your Disposal. And The Tools Rule.
Don’t get me wrong, I love the Outlook meeting invites as much as the next cubicle dweller, I’ve just always had the idea that one should at least discuss the fact that a meeting might happen before sending out a meet-me-at-this-time email. But here, people use meeting invites as the entire message.

Bob: Date: Wednesday, June 24 / Time: 10:30-11:30 / Meet with Kate
Me: ???

I may or may not know Bob, and we probably haven’t even discussed the need for a meeting. But if the time in my calendar doesn’t have anything else on it, it’s free game – and considered semi-rude to decline a meeting request when there’s not a conflicting appointment on one’s calendar. So I find myself blocking out lunch, work time for specific projects, pretty soon bathroom breaks.

It seems people get so excited that they are able to see my calendar and send me a meeting invitation that will go directly to their calendar, the actual content of the meeting is a total second (if ever) thought.

I know it’s rough to learn this stuff from scratch. Especially in an agency with fabulous people who get along well and would just as soon hang over each other’s cubicles and chat like they have for years.

As a champion Chatty Cathy, I sympathize. I suck it up. I play by the rules.

But I still think it’s weird.


Thanks to Flickr's summitcheese for the great photo!